Friends

Day two hundred sixty-four

2 Samuel 15-19

The effects of David’s sin with Bathsheba are in full bloom.  David has seen his family demolished; innocent lives devastated and precious people destroyed.  All because of the choices he made.  He is at the lowest point of his life!  His own son, Absalom, has risen up in rebellion against David and has driven him from his palace and from the city of Jerusalem.  This passage finds David on the run for his life from his own son.

At this point in time David does not need a lecture on being a better father.  He does not need a seminar on how to govern a kingdom.  He does not need someone coming along to tell him what a failure he is.  He knows that well enough by now.  What David needs is a friend!

2 Samuel 15-19 talks about some friends that walked into David’s life at just the moment he needed them.  The scriptures say, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother,” (Proverbs 18:24).  I want to take a look at the friends that David had at this desperate time and the characteristics that made them "closer than a brother."

2 Sam. 15:18-22 – Ittai the Gittite a Heartfelt Friend

It seems that Ittai is the commander of a group of 600 men that came to Israel from Gath to follow David (v 18).  Gath, is in the land of the Philistines.  It was also the home of Goliath.  You might also remember that David spent some time living with the Philistines when he was on the run from King Saul (1 Sam. 27-30).  Apparently, David made an impression on Ittai and the rest of these men.  Now that David is on the run again, Ittai expresses his desire to be with David.

Ittai is a person who has been in the background.  This is the first time his name is mentioned.  But, when the chips were down in David’s life, Ittai steps up and demonstrates the depths of his life for the exiled king.  In fact, he pledges his absolute allegiance to David, even if it means death for Ittai (v 21).  That is a true friend.  Many people will be your friend when all is well in your life and when they can benefit from being around you.  A real friend loves you when you have absolutely nothing left to give!

2 Sam. 15:23-28 – Zadok and Abiathar Humble Friends

Zadok and Abiathar were priests.  They were men of God who loved David and wanted to follow him.  When he fled from Absalom, they followed David bringing with them the Ark of the Covenant.  David, however, sends them back to Jerusalem, placing his trust in the power of God to deliver him (v 25-26).  David tells them that they can best serve him by being his eyes in the city. Then, without comment, the two priests turn around and carry the Ark back into the city. By returning to Jerusalem and agreeing to act as spies for David, these men took a great risk!  They put their very lives on the line for their friend.

These two demonstrate one of the great marks of a true friend.  A genuine friend will love you and accept you, even when he does not understand you or agree with you. A real friend will stand by you regardless of the risks involved.  They will stick out their necks for you.  They will be there when others turn and walk away.  A genuine friend might even get hurt in the process of taking your side.  But, no matter when you look, you will find them standing firm, in your corner. That is a real friend! If you have a friend like that, then God has greatly blessed your life. 

Sam. 15:30-37 – Hushai the Archite an Honest Friend

The next friend to come to David’s side was a man named Hushai.  We are told in verse 37 that he is David’s friend.  He comes to meet David as David is leaving Jerusalem, and Hushai is clearly in mourning.  He is broken hearted over what is happening to his king and to his friend.  David sends him back into the city.  He tells him to go to Absalom and feign allegiance.  David wants Hushai to counter the counsel of Ahithophel.  Ahithophel was David’s counselor and he was also Bathsheba’s grandfather.  Maybe he saw the rebellion of Absalom as an opportunity to get even with David for what he had done to Bathsheba and Uriah.  So, Hushai does what David asks and saves David’s life (2 Sam. 17:15-22).  He served as David’s eyes and ears in the throne room.  He was heroic in that he laid his life on the line for his friend.  One slip and Hushai would have been a dead man!

Few, but precious are the friends that will take that kind of stand for you.  David was blessed in that he had a few people who were willing to take a chance to help him in his time of need.  He had Hushai, Zadok, Abiathar, their two sons Jonathan and Ahimaaz, an unknown girl who took a message (17:17), and an unnamed woman who hid Jonathan and Ahimaaz as they carried a message to David (17:18-21).

2 Sam. 17:27-29 – Shobi, Machir and Barzillai Helpful Friends
These three men were nobodies who became somebody’s in the life of David.  They walked in when most everyone else walked out.  When they came, they came in at the right time and they came with exactly what David needed.  Let’s look at these men a little closer.

Shobi – He was an Ammonite.  His father, Nahash the king of Ammon was cruel beyond words (1 Sam. 11).  His brother Hunan had embarrassed David’s messengers (2 Sam. 10).  But, Shobi became an ally of David and stood by him through these difficult days.  David had fought against his people.  But, Shobi did not allow the past to cloud his love for David.

 Machir – He was the man from Lo-debar who gave shelter to Mephibosheth.  He was the kind of person who had a tenderseemed to want to reach out and help others.  He may have thought that he had already given enough, but he gave more because he was David’s friend. He never forgot what David had done for Mephibosheth.

Barzillai – He was an old man and had plenty of money (2 Sam. 19:32).  He could have said, “Get someone else!  I’m old and I’m tired.”  But, he didn’t!  He was David’s friend and he rose to the challenge. When he was needed, he came and he gave to his friend.

These men reveal the true nature of friendship.  They gave without being asked and they asked for nothing in return.  They gave out of love with no hidden agenda.  They did what they did because they loved David.  He was their friend and no price was too high and no inconvenience too great.  They did what they could for their friend!

Notice where David is when these three some to him.  He is in a place called “Mahanaim”.  This is not the first time this place has been mentioned in the Bible.  The first time it is mentioned in during the life of Jacob. As Jacob returned home after 20 years in exile, the angels of the Lord met him in “Mahanaim” (Gen. 32:1-2).  Just like the angels came and ministered to Jacob; Shobi, Machir and Barzillai came and did angel’s work in David’s life.  How thankful David must have been for friends like these!

2 Sam. 19:1-8 - Joab an Honest Friend
The last friend we will consider is David’s nephew, and the commander of his army, Joab. During the battle to retake Jerusalem and to bring David back to the throne, David’s son Absalom becomes trapped in a tree by his hair (2 Sam. 18:9-17).  Joab finds him hanging there and he and his armor-bearers kill Absalom.  When David hears the news, he is devastated and goes off by himself to mourn (2 Sam. 18:23-33).  David is overcome with grief and guilt and cannot comprehend that the kingdom had been returned to him.

When Joab hears how David is acting, he went to David and rebuked him for not praising the people for bringing him back to the throne.  He reminds David that there are larger issues at stake.  David is still king and as king; he has a responsibility to the people.  He reminds David that he has a job to do!  David sees his error and goes out to meet the people.  Joab was a friend because he told David the truth!  He would not stand by and watch his friend make a mistake that he would later regret.   

That is what a friend does!  They will tell you the truth about your life and your decisions.  They do so not to hurt you, but to help you avoid the pain that comes with foolish errors.  Here is what the scriptures say about this kind of friend, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kissess of an enemy are deceitful" (Pro. 27:6).  David had a friend like that in Joab and he had a friend like that in Nathan the Prophet (2 Sam. 12:7). If you have a friend who loves you enough to tell you the truth, then you are a blessed individual.  Real friends pull no punches, they tell us the truth.

This period of David’s life was the hardest he would ever face.  And, he faced it with the help of his friends.  The people God providentially placed within his life made the road easier and the burden lighter.  David was a rich man, not because he had wealth, position and power, but because he had friends!  May we all be blessed to have such friends in our lives too!