Finding God in the Darkness

Day one hundred twenty

I had a great day with my husband yesterday and was still filled with gratitude this morning! I love when I wake up in a good mood, filled with gratitude for the blessings in my life, and ready to have a great conversation with the Lord.  I prayed this morning with gratitude and love in my heart.  It was a great way to start the day!

Exodus 7-11

I remember as a little girl being afraid of the dark and needing to sleep with a night light.  I just knew that something would come out of the closet or out from underneath my bed and get me.  I was one of those kids with a very active imagination and often had bad dreams or night terrors.  I knew that the darkness was real and it scared me!  My poor mom would wake up to my screams and come in to calm me down. The darkness has always presented a challenge for me, so whenever I find verses regarding the darkness in the scriptures I take a little time to try and understand it.  Here is what I learned today:

Genesis 15:12 speaks of an experience that Abraham has with the darkness:  "And when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and, lo, an horror of great darkness fell upon him."  [He saw the misery of Egyptian bondage that would come upon his posterity, the children of Israel]

This reminds me of when Joseph Smith felt the darkness in the Sacred Grove: "Thick darkness gathered around me, and it seemed to me for a time as if I were doomed to sudden destruction." (JS-H-1:15)

Exodus 10: 21-23 speaks of darkness over the land of Egypt, even darkness which may be felt, a thick darkness.  [This is one of the ten plagues and is followed by the death of the firstborn]

This makes me think of the darkness connected with Christ's death (Helaman 14:20; 1 Ne 19:10; 3 Ne 8:20-23; Luke 23:44-45)

None of these verses was making me feel any better about the darkness, but there is another side to the darkness.  I would find some inspiration in Exodus 20 that shed some light on the darkness: "And the people stood afar off, and Moses drew near unto the thick darkness where God was" (Exodus 20:21).  Wait God is in the darkness!  I went back and looked at each of the instances mentioned, could I find God in the darkness? 

The darkness Abraham felt let him experience the wickedness and pain behind the Israelites bondage, it made an impression on him.  He drew closer to the Lord from this experience.

The darkness helped Joseph recognize evil, this would be helpful throughout his life as he would face much evil as he restored the gospel.

The darkness would prove to Pharaoh that the Hebrew God had power over the Egyptian Sun God.  It also helped distinguish the wicked from God's chosen people the Israelites, for they had light in their dwellings. 

The darkness during Christ's death was necessary because God had given a prophecy regarding the darkness as a sign of Christ's death.  All prophecies must be fulfilled.

This physical darkness is not a bad thing, it is actually a warning sign from God. Finding God in the darkness  has given me a different perspective, it is actually a good thing.  I am meant to learn from it. 

When I was a child my mom taught me to pray when I was afraid of the darkness, to ask God to protect me.  As an adult it seems to me that when I "feel" the darkness in my life I should stop and ask myself, what am I supposed to be learning from this experience?  I wish I would have learned this lesson earlier in my life it would have made bedtime so much easier!