A Help Meet

Day forty-seven

My mind has been on those in my life that are facing challenges ranging from cancer to marriage problems.  I decided to dedicate my prayer time to them this morning.  I thanked the Lord for making me aware of their needs and for the opportunity that I have to serve them and pray for them.  I asked him to please bless and comfort them, to guide them, and to guide those around them to know how we can best serve them.  Most of all, to let them know that they are loved and not alone.

My scripture study takes me to Moses Chapter 3 this morning. In chapter 3 we learn that all things were first created spiritually and we learn more about Adam and Eve.

I would like to start in verse 18: "And I, the Lord God, said unto mine Only Begotten, that it was not good that the man should be alone; wherefore, I will make an help meet for him."

Help meet
This verse says a lot about God, it shows his great love for us and his understanding of the importance of the human connection.  He understands that we need other people in our lives to live up to our full potential.  It also tells us how he views the relationship between a husband and a wife.  He uses the term 'help meet' to describe what Eve's place will be.  There is a quote from Howard W. Hunter regarding this term:

“A man who holds the priesthood accepts his wife as a partner in the leadership of the home and family with full knowledge of and full participation in all decisions relating thereto...The Lord intended that the wife be a help meet for man (meet means equal)—that is, a companion equal and necessary in full partnership. Presiding in righteousness necessitates a shared responsibility between husband and wife; together you act with knowledge and participation in all family matters. For a man to operate independently of or without regard to the feelings and counsel of his wife in governing the family is to exercise unrighteous dominion” (in Conference Report, Oct. 1994, 68; or Ensign, Nov. 1994, 50–51 ).

Although the husband and the wife have different parts to play in a family: the father is to preside over, provide for, and protect, and the mother is primarily responsible for the nurturing of children; they are to look to each other as equals and partners.  Anything other than this type of relationship is considered unrighteous dominion, which means, it is not of God.

The Rib (Moses 3:18)
Is there significance to the woman coming from the rib? 
I know that there is debate as to whether God actually removed Adam's rib to create Eve.  President Spencer W. Kimball taught that the story of the rib is figurative. But I think the discussion should be on what is the significance of the rib, not whether it was actually taken. There is a teaching about this that comes from the Hebrew Talmud that I would like to share:

"Be careful if you make a woman cry; because God counts her tears.  The woman came out of a man's rib.  Not from his feet to be walked on.  Not from his head to be superior, but from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved."

Beautifully said!  I think the Rabbi that taught this had a good understanding of what God was trying to teach.

Shall be One Flesh (Moses 3:24)
Building a relationship where you become 'one flesh' is one of life's greatest challenges and it can seem almost impossible to reach when you look at the number of divorces in the world today.  We sometimes may feel like, how will we ever make it?

I don't have all the answers and I think each situation is different, but there are a few things that the Lord mentions in this verse that I think we should look at.

Leave his father and mother:  President Kimball stated that: "the woman occupies the first place. She is preeminent, even above the parents...even the children must take their proper but significant place."  This is true for us women too, we must place our husbands in first place.  I am not always good at this, but I have noticed that when I follow this advice my marriage is so much stronger.  We feel important to each other and I really enjoy the attention!

Cleave unto his wife:  Cleave means to be closely united or to join. There is a trust that comes with marriage that once you are united or joined together you will always be there for each other, especially during the hard times.  I am very fortunate in this department, my husband is my best friend, which has led us to want to be there for each other.  We turn to each other first and we have learned to turn to the Lord as a couple.  The blessings of such a relationship have allowed us to beat the odds of the world that our marriage wouldn't last and has strengthened our love for each other over the years.

Be one flesh: I have always thought of this as being one in purpose.  It means taking the time to understand  the other person mentally, socially, sexually, and spiritually.  This takes looking at your spouse through God's eyes, which is not always easy.  It means looking at your relationship with an eternal perspective and not letting the things of the world get in the way.  By far, this is the biggest challenge in a relationship and has eternal consequences.  This is one of our greatest responsibilities, but also can bring us our greatest joy.

I love the teachings the Lord has given in these verses for a successful marriage.  I wish the world would take a moment and remember these things.  Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone stopped and re-evaluated their marriage under the terms set by God, and made a plan to implement these teachings to strengthen their relationship.  What a great gift it would be to the families of the world if every parent decided to be a better 'help meet' to their spouse, Satan would have no power over them or their families. We would be one step closer to a perfect world!