Sabbath through Spiritual Eyes

Day two

As I woke this morning, the realization that it is Fast Sunday hit me.  This is not a bad thing, but it also is not one of my favorite things.  I enjoy participating in the sacrament and worshipping the Lord and hearing testimonies, but testimonies are not always what I hear.  A testimony led by the Spirit is an amazing gift for the one bearing it and the one listening.  It is the travel-monies, thank-imonies, and such that really make it difficult for me to sit and listen.  It seems to me that where a pure testimony glorifies and praises God anything else is somewhat disrespectful to him.

With that in mind I said my morning prayers with a special plea to my Father in Heaven, please bless those that bear their testimonies today to have the Spirit with them and please bless me with the ability to be spiritually minded.  I was hopeful!

Well, the meeting did not go as well as I had hoped.  I did enjoy some of the testimonoies, then I started to drift.  I don't blame those that spoke, I am sure they felt that the spirit was guiding them.  I desparately tried to stay focused on what they were trying to say.  I thought to myself, what is the message I should take from this?  Alas, my attention span got the best of me (there is a reason I work with the youth!) and I pulled out my scriptures to read. 

I read the rest of D&C Section 64.  This section has some interesting verses about forgiveness.  It covers topics like who God forgives and why, what is my part in forgiving, and who should I forgive.  I am particularly grateful for forgiveness as I know that I am often in need of it. 

This section also includes some missionary verses.  Verse 29 really stood out to me "Wherefore, as ye are agents, ye are on the Lord's errand; and whatever ye do according to the will of the Lord is the Lord's business."

What is the Lord's business for me?  What was I supposed to be doing at church today?  This is what consumed my thoughts for the rest of the meeting.  I don't know that I really heard any of the testimonies after reading this verse.  I pondered somewhat on what my job was at church today.  I came to worship the Lord, to feel the Spirit, to take the sacrament, and to be edified.  Was I doing my part to reach that goal?

I did attend my meetings, I expressed my love for the gospel, I partook of the sacrament, I felt the Spirit in my own way, and I did learn a thing or two.  So I guess it wasn't a disaster, but I can't stop wondering if I missed out on something more because I couldn't stay focused.  The Lord states in verse 34 "...the Lord requireth the heart and a willing mind:"  My heart he has, it is the willing mind that I must continue to work on.  Thank goodness for forgiveness and mercy!

I am choosing to take the attitude of; I have a whole week to prepare myself to try again next Sunday!  Maybe by then I will be spiritually minded enough to know what is the Lord's business for me!  Prayers and studying will commence!